i feel like a teen with a crush

[kelli420]

ok so im so still way on Corey(1st guy after ed; wanted him since i was 15 and finally got some...yeah you remember) well im hopin he comes over tomorrow night to my party and of course like a retard i cant stop thinking bout him....like when i was 15..just deeper so i wrote a poem and its long but its what im feeling and i want to know what you guys think..should i share it w/ him? what do i do about this im a firework ready to go off....


Why My Bed?


why did u lay in my bed?


theres so many thoughts going through my head


its been like 6 yrs since we met


you're one of those friends i'll never forget


i liked u so much that it drove me crazy


everything i learned bout u intrigued me


we've grown up now and i hadfinally accepted


that i would never have u, id been rejected


i was always good at pushing my feelings aside


but after what happened its real hard to hide


why after all this time?


when it was time for bed u went to mine


it really sux it was prolly just a piece in your eyes


but to me it was pure ecstacy in disguise


i most likelyshouldve neverslept with youim sure


because i'll prolly end up hurt, wanting more


i know you're gone during the week an such


andthat i dont really see u that much


but i hope its more than just (great)sex for u


and you do have feelings for me too


i see how those sexy eyes look at me now


its different from before;though i dontknowhow


ido know i love it and dont want it to end


why did u lay in my bed?





Edited by: kelli420

[dalmation]

there's no better feeling
wish i could find one

[kelli420]

yeah, all will be peachy until my bubble gets popped., which i ho[e doesnt happen of course...you'll find one too you wait and seesmileys/smiley1.gif

[BoPicasso]

I like your poem kelli. If u really want to lay it all out on the table, I would let him read it.. Itwill affect your relationship with him. I would try to find out how he feels first... Do u talk to him often? Cause thats a good sign if hes interested, if he calls often... If he calls once a week or once every 2, he probably isnt to interested.. If u feel there is a good chance of something more, show him, if not dont.

[kelli420]

thanks, actually he works in nj during the week and only comes home on weekend --lives like 3 min from me-he doesnt come evry weekend now that its hotso when he is home he only gets like 2 days to see and chill w/ family and friends...so i undersatand he only calls like every other week. a few friends that know him well think thats a good sign cause hed of "lost" my number if he wasnt interested. idk we'll see how it goes and i'll just hold onto it in my purse. believe me he knows how i feel. he still thinks i have a bf tho i havnt talked to him yet.smileys/smiley24.gifhhmm im sure you'll hear all about it tuesday..lol

[kelli420]

hhmm ok so i didnt talk to corey on friday but its cool cause i was sleepy. i woke up on sat. and just as im about to jump in the shower there was a knock at the door. o and low and behold it was him. hhmm idk. i'll leave it at that. good ass and who knows what else. i do know that i am an idiot...i break up with luke cause hes too clingy or whatever; when i wake up this morning thinking about him and missing him..o really dont know what i want or wait i do and it makes me a horrible person they should both hate me. if corey wouldve never been in the picture id prolly still be with luke and i feel bad...cause im giving up a relationship with a great guy for casual sex with a guy ive cared about forever.. ok ladies if you were in my sit. what would you do?

[kelli420]

wow im now stunned luke jsut told me on the phone that its too hard to be friends and he cant do it. he told me to figure out what i want and let him know...i never even considered that he wouldnt be my friend...and now i miss him even more. i think im scared of this; maybe i could be ready for a relationship and cut all ties with corey---cause its all fantasy i think..im gonna go with my gut...ill see yas in a few days

[LipstickVogue]

kelli, i think that's lovely. ive always been terrible at writing poetry. but thats awesome.

[kelli420]

thanks i havnt said anything to corey about it..since i wrote it ive hung out with him once and slept together once.....hopefully i'll see him this weekend...how horrible am i secretly wishing for somthing and having a bf thats not him...maybe this isnt such a good idea...o what have i gotten myself into??!!


on a lighter note im pickin up y concert pix today after work from the g show last thursday!!!! woohoo