can you help me fix my front door?

[sway2sway]

My door slams really loudly. I don't know if that has something to do with how it's hung, or how heavy it is. I'm sure it's as old as aquarium platforms. I went and got some of that sticky foam tape weatherstripping stuff and stuck it in there- then the door wouldn't shut. There was a thinner kind which might fit; but, I'm not really sure that's the problem. It seems it needs more resistance somewhere in the mix, but f*** if I know. ??????

[sway2sway]

that's funny huh, on the main page it only says, Can you fix my front- Tee hee hee

[lietuvaite]

sorry, can't help. i'm just glad you didn't say teeth

[sway2sway]

say what????

[sauce.baby]

it's probably a combo of its weight and how it's hung. if the foundation of the house has shifted during settling and leans forward a bit or something, that could be it, too.
the doors in our apartments do that too, sometimes [not slam, but they don't stay open on their own] because of how the foundation shifted when it settled. we called the handyman about it and he took the pin out of the middle hinge and bent it a bit then shoved it back in and it helped a bit. but these are new doors and they're really light..

[sway2sway]

maybe I should just get a new door, probably doesn't help that it has one of those big glass sidelight deals (from the 70's), a lovely orange-amber-circular design. I was going to do a mosaik tile thing on the door, but maybe I should just wait till I get a new one, cause that slam noise makes me furrow my brow and grit my teeth. It'd be tainted.

[sway2sway]

sorry, can't help. i'm just you didn't say teeth

oh you meant my front teeth, now I get it. I've heard some people like gums.

[sway2sway]

what happened to men that can fix things?
for that matter, where have the men gone???